Top 10 Reasons Why Section E Doesn't Have Internships

1) Enron wasn’t hiring.

2) The sugar industry in India has gained efficiencies in the past 7 months since senior management left.

3) Coca-Cola cut back its marketing spend thanks to Scott’s grass roots marketing last semester.

4) Highland Capital unexpectedly closed its operations after a lecture from Elena about the evils of capitalism.

5) Paul didn’t come across as genuine in the TIVO interview.

6) Beth lost her train of thought in her Bain interview after Makambo unexpectedly walked in.

7) Diageo decided to lay off its marketing department after its CEO learned of Ugwunna’s incredible insight that “people drink in good times and in bad times.”

8) After talking about GE in his GM interview, Alex fondly referred to the interviewer as “Jack.”

9) Chun was dinged from the final round at JP Morgan after a company background check revealed that he had been illegally smuggling bubbleyum and saltwater taffy into Singapore.

10) Mora’s mid-case interview question, “What are we talking about again? Shampoo?” didn’t cut it in the McKinsey interview.