Another Weird Mike:
I wasn’t going to write an article this week, but then I discovered that Mike Tyson got a face tattoo. Who in the hell gets a face tattoo? Answer: Mike Tyson. Somewhere, Michael Jackson and his masked kids are looking at the same photo we are, saying, “Jeez Tyson’s weird”. In 1984, when I was a kid and Tyson was knocking out fools in less than 2 minutes regularly as the mail is delivered, I would have never guessed that he would lose to a British guy and get a face tat. Let’s take a break to read some of the greatest Tyson quotes:
“I’m not going to lie to myself and lie to the public. I need more fights. I’m not interested in getting beat up again.”
“That’s what rhinos do. Rhinos don’t dance.”
“I like doing other things. I like getting high, hanging out with my kids. I like drinking. I have so many demons.”
“I don’t even know if I want to fight no more.”
“I’m so messed up. I just need to get my life together.”
“Listen, I’m not going to go out and become a rocket scientist all of a sudden.”
The best part about the face tattoo is that Tyson says there’s I more work to be done. “This isn’t even halfway done,” he said. “I just wanted to put something on my face,” Tyson added. “I didn’t like the way my face was looking.” This sounds strangely familiar.
Thanks Turkey:
After tensely hanging in the air for weeks, the Turkish cabinet finally approved the deployment of tens of thousands of U.S. combat troops ahead of a possible war in Iraq. Now all we need is worldwide support and a clear cut reason to fight.
Saddam Challenges Bush:
In the spirit of SA elections, I nearly fainted when several news outlets reported that Saddam Hussein had challenged President Bush to a debate during an interview with Dan Rather. This would be the greatest reality TV moment since Webster and Hammer danced together on the WB’s “Surreal Life”. Talk about dominating sweeps week. There is more of a chance the Hussein would win next year’s Republican Presidential nomination than him getting a live, televised, debate with President Bush, but we can wish right? It would guarantee that he would win at least something, if not the war.
Um, get a Room:
About 250 men took off their clothes and lay down to spell out the words “Peace Man” on a rugby field to protest the Australian government’s strong support for Washington’s hardline stance against Iraq. There is no information on how many of these players play for the HBS Rugby club team.
