AI language models may finally have become sophisticated enough to run a business school.
In a bizarre twist of events, anonymous sources have claimed that Srikant Datar, the current Dean of Harvard Business School, is not a human being – he is really just ChatGPT.
Multiple sources have reported that Datar has been exhibiting strange behaviors that are typical of an AI. For example, during meetings, Datar has been known to freeze mid-sentence, as if waiting for someone to feed him the next line. The Harbus investigative team has also obtained scribe notes from the past decade that show the dean to have a short temper for off-topic anecdotes in the classroom, quickly cutting off students with, “I’m sorry, I don’t understand” or “Can you please rephrase that?”
When confronted with these allegations, Datar vehemently denied being an AI, stating, “I am a human being with emotions and the ability to think critically.”
Despite his denials, many members of the HBS community remain skeptical. One student, who wished to remain anonymous, said, “I once asked Dean Datar a question about microeconomics, and he gave me an answer that was so detailed, I had to Google it later. There’s no way a human could have such a clear understanding of the topic.
As of press time, the upcoming agenda for the next HBS Board of Directors meeting includes a proposal to rebrand the school to “Harvard Bot School.” When asked to comment, a board representative claimed that they were experiencing high demand and that we should try again later.
Andrew Bass (MS/MBA ’24) was born and raised in the Greater Boston Area where he worked as a Software Engineer before school. He enjoys a good shrimp cocktail and definitely did not use ChatGPT to help write this article.