10. Include jobs with tuition
This would make the experience oh so much more enjoyable, you know, without the entire stressful begging for employment thing. It could be like a vacation package deal, rather than flight and hotel, great education and $120,000 job for $50,000 per year – Whata deal! I actually think this is feasible, given the recent $32 million contribution to HBS. Just like a Burger and Fries. They could call it a happy meal or something.
9. Move HBS to Miami
It’s cold in Boston and the people are rude and honk their horns too much (sorry Bostonians). Miami is the perfect solution; great weather, still in the states, close to the Caribbean and no local baseball team to incite the local proletariat to riot.
8. Switch to a one case per day format every once in a while
I think plenty of us have these anyway, but it would be nice if these were scheduled.
7. Cable in dorm rooms
“Daddy, please, I won’t do it again.”
“No, this is the last straw, no cable for 2 years”
Oh – it was just a dream, or was it.
6. Build Tunnel between SFP
I don’t live in SFP, but the other editors seem to think it’s a great idea. I think another way to go would be to install a subway system under the campus or even a heated rickshaw solution might work here. Wimps.
5. Fix computers in Aldrich
At this point, I just assume that they don’t work. It would be nice if they were more than just props.
4. Produce a case on The Harbus with That Guy as the Protagonist.
This is for completely selfish reasons, but also for the benefit of campus given that The Harbus is the center of the free world and should be studied at least as much as the Amercian Capitalism model, Toyota’s TPS, or GAAP rules on Operating Leases. By the way, obviously no one reads these editorials because people are still asking me if I’m “That Guy”. I can see the case now, referring to that “That Guy” as “This Guy” or “That Dude” to disguise his identity. Finally, when he came out to give his presentation at the end of case discussion, all of these rumors could be put to bed when everyone sees that “That Guy” is really Gary Coleman.
3. Extend hours at Spangler for studying and eating
With all of the cases and work, why does the campus assume that we are done at midnight? It would be great to get an extra hour for the Grille and for studying in the lounge. The fireplaces are great though, almost decadent. So are the leather couches. Longer hours would be great, and I would like to have someone rub my feet while I sit at the fireplace reading cases and cranking out cover letters like Hormel does little sausages.
2. Install Direct Satellite Television at the Grille Now.
What we are talking about is sustainable competitive advantage. No one would ever watch television in the dorm lounges again. Imagine, every football, basketball, and baseball game. Profits would skyrocket and HBS food services would recognize at least a 5 year 25% compounded annual growth rate. Probably, the Middle East Conflict would be resolved as a result.
1. Bring Dubya to Class:
All of our guests are really interesting, but let’s get our number #1 alumnus. I would love to see the President respond to our questions after the case discussion using a teleprompter, then have 30% of Section I arrested under suspicion of subversive activity based on their lengthy questions.
