Dear Gaurav

This worries me a little. Not because you think there is a ‘really hot girl’ on campus, god forbid, no, I’m perturbed by the fact that the word ‘soulmate’ and the word ‘hot’ appear in the same sentence. Where one implies you want the whole cake, the other implies you only want the cherry on top. Ditch the whole soulmate notion – its over rated. Nibble first, bite later.

To get her, repel the idea of tedious old skool gentlemanly stuff, doing her homework, buying her flowers and helping open her Spangler mail box. These corporate lasses need a different tactic – shark her and make her confront you! Give her a mid class cold call – “ramble ramble ramble, but I’d like to hear what hottie has to say about macro economic theorists in the late 1950’s re-depression cycle and their application to current corporate philanthropic ideals”. Drop her in it! Disagree with everything she says in class, when she says the sky is blue, you say its green, when she says bond math is turd, you say it excites you considerably, when she says the weather’s cold, turn up in your shorts. Eventually she will ask what your problem is, and then you’re in.

Now, you can easily spend time together to resolve differences, it wont appear suspiciously lecherous now. Discuss and argue the merits of each others viewpoint and pretend to always come round to her way of thinking – flattering her and giving her ego a much needed boost. Start to admire her opinion and respect her judgement (this will be a tough one to play). If well-executed, this spending a bit of time, this little love hate thing, and this uneasy tension that developed will leave your love vixen wanting.

Go get that vixen!

Gaurav