Bad Advice

Nishkam Prabodh, Satire Editor

Mitsi Picot (MBA ’22), superstar RC and winner at life shares advice on navigating life at HBS; Nishkam Prabodh (MBA ’22) reports. 

The sun is back. And not just shiny, it is warm and everything. Arms are back in fashion!

The sight of beautiful people steeped in inane conversations on Spangler lawns is such a welcome sight after months of white and black snow. Stupid, vicious snow. Bless you, good Boston weather. I had no idea you meant so much to me.

On one of these sunny mornings, I had the pleasure of sitting down with an old friend. While the original plan was to catch up and talk about people and the general state of affairs around us, our chat, as it often does, inadvertently turned into a counselling session.

Here are some excerpts from my chat with popular RC, winner at life, summer intern at a high growth unicorn, and my personal life coach: Mitsi Picot (MBA ’22).

How are you finding the Spring semester so far?

Loving it. The courses are such an upgrade. The beer simulation was such an improvement over last year’s. That, plus pre-made DCFs, critiquing entire nations and judging famous criminals? Oh yeah, that’s the life!

And how cool is that curling rink? Love it. Use it all the time.

Are you set for the summer? How has recruitment been?

Like most things in life, recruitment is about expectation management. You can’t have a set plan. Goalposts will shift in your search for perfection. My own goalpost shifted 23 times in the last five months—I have been everything from an aspirational consultant, wannabe PM, a wishful investment professional. Eventually it was a toss between a strategy role at a start-up and a PE internship. Turns out I am an entrepreneur after all. Of course, my consulting firm is footing my tuition, so none of that really matters.

My internship is remote. It is unsafe to go to the office, what with Covid-19 and all. So I am going to travel in the summer and work from wherever I am.

Looks like we will get the vaccine soon. That is good news, right?

Well not good enough! You do realize how important we are to the world, don’t you? I mean, who else will provide arrogant perspectives with the benefit of hindsight to businesses who don’t need advice from MBAs? You think all those firms will appraise their own NPV? How are HBS students not in the top priority?

I am speaking up for my classmates, of course. I already got all the antibodies I need the old-fashioned way. Just a day of fever and some body aches. I’ve had worse after skiing trips. Don’t know what all the fuss is about.

Must be all those deaths, I guess. Have you been on any trips this semester? 

I have been in Cambridge throughout. The beach photos you saw were Zoom backgrounds.

Any tips on activities outside the classroom? How do I productively utilize my time here?

You could do one of those conference things. We can never have enough Zoom in our lives, right? Oh, and embellish it with a cause or a passion, keep it real. Makes it easier to network that way.

Other than that, you need to keep that aggressive drinking game up. As much as it devastates me, we’re all getting on in years. Last few years left to party. Lastly, if you are still single, you need to date aggressively too. Last chance to find love, really.

So are you doing well on the dating front?

Oh, you know. A little of this, a little of that. I think I have been on too many Hinge dates. Good ones lead to more dates. Bad ones end in BOMO. The worst ones end in spirited debates about Bitcoins and recent IPOs. Uggh, hate those!

The key thing to remember is that while dates may come and dates may go, you need to go on.

Here is some proper advice, though: prioritize looks. A lot of people will talk to you about values, humour, empathy and all that hogwash. Trust me, none of that matters as long as you look good. Gosh good looks are underrated!

Picot left in a rush as she had to attend her RC advisory session (remember those?). I was hoping for parting words of somber wisdom but all I got was a swift elbow bump. Ah well, while they still exist.

Nishkam Prabodh (MBA ’22) lived and worked in India before coming to HBS. Or so he says. His accent is definitely Scottish.