The True Tale of the HBS Show

Gather, my children, and you shall know
Of the glorious story of the HBS Show.
And why, you might ask, was this on the down-low?
Well, it started off slow, then it started to grow.

In a dark lonely winter, back in ’74.
Before Spangler and Grafton, second year was a bore.
Law School had its Parody, the college its Pudding,
Only B-School, it seemed, had no fun off-putting.

But EC Joe Parish had a little idea
A wonderful, terrible, smashing idea.
He thought: we’ve got talent, and plenty of wits.
I’ll put on some skits then print up the tix.

Using only one spotlight, and little else more,
The students rehearsed, then they opened the door –
And the audience they came,

And Joe Parish, he realized, this wasn’t a game.
The show made little sense, but they came all the same.
With two sold-out nights, his venture was a success,
And the cast they would toast with champagne excess.

After that it was settled, the show it would stay,
Every year, now in Burden, we put on this play.
Through the years it has changed and never gets old.
The themes tend to vary, but do fit a mold –
It must have a real plot, and mock something funny
Like the time we cast Skilling as a fuzzy pink bunny.

All kidding aside the shows have been quite clever,
With some silly characters such as Luke Skydecker.
Who once took the stage and sang songs without censure,
And faced down nefarious Dot Cahm and Darth Venture.

So Star Wars, it’s true, was a popular premise,
Then back in ’02 still before The Apprentice
Our writers were smart and beat Trump to the punch.
Reality at Harvard was based on a hunch,
The producers were clever and made a good pitch:
Let America vote on our grades, don’t you wish?

You ECs, of course, you remember this now,
That last year Dean Kester, though we never knew how
He lost crimson cash worth one billion dollars.
It went away fast, then Clark started to holler.

And the FBI came with an offer so smart
Why not hide our key witness, he has a good heart.
His name’s Whit Selblower, yes he’ll blend in just fine
Keep his identity secret, you’ll get every dime.

Yet Whit’s cover was thin, and students started to wonder.
Even Prof Canton-Derstand noticed the blunder.
And soon, evil Reese Tatedearnings, they clamored
Would take poor Whit’s life before facing the slammer.

What happened next, you can guess, wasn’t pretty.
But the show it went on, and with lyrics – so witty!
In songs “Scorpion Bowl” and “One Moment in TOM”
The singers and dancers performed without qualm.

It took a long time, some eleven months coming,
From writing, to casting, to painting, to drumming,
Weeks of rehearsals and behind-the-scenes patience
Brought four sold-out nights with four standing ovations.